not very valentine...

& so here
is Q's interpretation
of why i have been absent for a few days
& why very valentine went south...
i debated on just having you guess
what happened
using Q's drawing
& your own deductive reasoning...
i really would love to do that
but a few of you already know
so that would be unfair
& i don't want to endorse cheating...

okay so anyway
ugh
i don't want to draw this out
& make it bigger than it is
(too late)
so
we got into a car crash on monday
it was not fun
(excellent observation!)
& let me first say:
everyone is fine!

we were in one of those neighborhoods that
have tons of criss crossing streets
& no stop signs
& i reached down to get something
& when i looked up
a big black suv was crashing into us
& then i drove into a tree...
(see Q's tree?
it's more of a symbol of a tree...
though it was a pretty small tree)
both of the vehicles were only dented
on the sides we hit in front of the doors
does that make sense?
she hit on our passenger side
but it was far enough up that the
passenger door could still be opened
& on her gigantic car
there was just a dentie thing on her driver's side
bumper corner in front of the wheel
so her door opened no problem too...
my front wheel did not fair well, though
it was sticking out perpendicular to the rest of the car
not a good sign for driving it again...
& then there was the tree...
it was small
about 8 inches in in circumference
(or is that radius?)
so actually it stopped us so that we didn't
run into someone's garage
that's a good thing...
i know you are so interested in
the injuries of the cars right?

anyway
neighbors came from far & wide
it was really something!
two ladies in particular helped out so much
they were so wonderful...
helped get a hold of brian
& helped with the kids
& prayed for us

in the end
merra had a little scratchie-rubbie-owie type of thing
(is that a contusion?)
on her shoulder from her car seatbelt
she didn't even notice it...

Q had nothing except a scared look on his face
poor guy
he was right there
it hit on his side...

the other driver's air bag deployed
& hit her arm so it was hurting
(go figure
her suv had a three foot (at most) dent
& the air bag deployed
my little civic was dented from mid bumper to
passenger door
& no air bag love for me)
(& she possibly had other things
that was the only thing she was saying hurt at the time)

& then there's me:
big long red owie from my shoulder to my cleavage
(i'm sorry! that's the only way to describe the area!
well, maybe mid-chest is better
or perhaps 'the valley'...)
bruises from 'that area' to my waist
a huge giant crazy bruise across my stomach
that just changes everyday
purpler & purpler...
& then also my knee
which we can't quite figure out
the doctor thought maybe it hit the steering wheel?
it was bruised & swollen
now it's just competing with the stomach bruise
for who can look the most like an inkblot test

ugh
i was crying half because it was scary
& i was in pain
& the other half because i was so
relieved that the kids were okay...
it's amazing how their well-being is
so much wrapped up into my everything.
i know it's like that for all parents...
we would always take the pain for our kids
if we could...

my dad & stepmom
who are always wonderful & would drop anything to help
did just that
canceled their whole weeks
& came to get the kids
& kept them for two night so that
i could have some recovery time
& it was a good thing
because when i woke up tuesday morning
i just started crying...
brian was already gone to work
so i was all alone
& it's predictable for anyone who has known me
for more than ten years:
i was just overwhelmed with
thought of my mom's car crash
(note to those who haven't known me since
the valley was shallow:
my mom died in a car crash in 1997
my sister & her friend were in the car, too
kate was in the hospital for 10 days
with many difficulties
& her friend was in a coma for a while.
the guy who hit them was drunk.
the guy had his kid in his truck with him.
the guy was the least injured of anyone (of course).
the guy escaped from the hospital.
the guy got arrested in a bar.
the guy is in jail.
where the guy belongs.)
so i'm crying & sobbing
& then my dear bff for over 20 years now
texted me:

bff: how are you this morning?
me: sore & sad
(phone rings)
bff: spill it
me: boo hoo hoo...

that's good stuff...
at least
it was for me that morning...
thanks ang!
:)

anyway
the tears & sadness?
totally predictable
but still really sucky

& Q...
dear Q: mom? i wish that car crash had been a dream

& the artsie, emotional, psycological probing part of me
(wait...is there another part of me?)
was so glad that he drew that picture...
you know?
i like that he's getting it out.
no stuffing 'round here...
except on thanksgiving...

also i wanted to
give a big emily ruth shout out
to my friends & fam who
called
emailed
texted
stopped by
face booked
smoke signaled...
thanks, friends!
you make yucky times bearable
:)

& so very valentine
is supended until next year...
maybe
who knows maybe i will pop up with
another entry in the next day or two...
or just bust one out in the middle of july...
you just never know around here...

in the meantime...
you know one of my favorite
forms of secret messages
is the word verifications
that you have to type in
when you comment on some blogs
or when you friend someone on facebook
so that the computer
knows that you are not a computer
(irony, no?)
& today this was one of mine:

hylve

i think it was a lovely little valentine note
to me from the computer...
'hi love' to you too, sweet mac
:)